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MEN SEX TOYS & MASTURBATION

MEN SEX TOYS & MASTURBATION

In the 1990s, Sex and The City normalised women masturbation and using sex toys. It was seen as a huge leap forward in breaking down taboos around self-love and female sexuality. Almost two decades later, and trends forecaster JWT Intelligence named 2017 the year of “vagina-nomics”, as pelvic floor muscle exercises, vulvar skincare, and g-spot stimulators gain popularity. Thanks to the fourth wave of feminism, women are encouraged to talk about their vaginas and vulvas like never before, whether that’s to do with periods, health, sex and masturbation or wellbeing. Straight men, on the other hand, are made to feel ashamed about masturbation and using sex toys. It is vital that both men and women give these gadgets a try, as they help to build a person’s understanding of their body and in turn helps them to be a better lover.

What do men need to know about trying out sex toys ( masturbation)?

Sex toys are the best way to become a much better lover. With toys, you can learn how to explore your entire body with greater patience and skill, understanding how to prevent immediate escalation to penis-centric masturbation. This parlays really well into appreciating your partner’s body and learning how to both relax your lover while really turning her on. Sex toys help you break down cultural barriers in a safe, private setting and help us understand not only our bodies but our selves. Particularly for straight men, there are so many acts that compromise our concept of masculinity and ‘what it means to be a man.’  These cultural walls corral not only our behaviour, but our psyches and our sense of self.  We end up being who we’re told or expected to be instead of who we want to be, and this is the cause of deep insecurity and a lack of clear identity. More important, however, is that is cripples empathy; for experience is the best route to understanding and understanding is the source of empathy. That a lack of empathy due to the increasingly narrow range of acceptable behaviour for straight men is the source of a lot of violence in this world. It is so easy to demonise ‘the other’ when you don’t understand them and fear them. Toys can also help men learn to delay orgasm, remain hard after orgasm, and have multiple orgasms. Once you get over this mental hump and you experience this, you’re no longer worried about ejaculating too quickly, losing your erection or not getting an erection.

What will sex toys be like in the future?

Current trends are towards remote interactivity, like controlling a device via the internet or via bluetooth at close range, more realistic flesh-like textures, interactive and artificial intelligence elements including virtual reality and talking, quasi-interactive dolls and or robots. Women’s toys are already so far ahead of men’s toys that there’s a bit of catching up to do. For instance, while men seem to want more life-like interactivity from their sex toy – full size, robotic sex dolls -I’ve never heard a woman say she wished her vibrator could talk to her.

Will sex toys be taking over from having sex with a real person?

This is already the case for some, and it will likely increase as straight men struggle to integrate into a world where simply being straight and white doesn’t automatically imbue you with power – despite present circumstances. We could see more of what’s playing out in Italy and Japan an increasingly sexless society or we could see the broader acceptance of toys, sexuality and the increased effectiveness in preventing and fighting STDs lead to another sexual awakening. Like everything else right now, things are at a tipping point.

Do you think men who are worried about trying anal or using sex toys are struggling with internalised homophobia and seeming ‘gay’?

Of course. This is a huge fear for many straight men. What would it mean to enjoy it?  What would it mean to even explore it? What would I do if I did enjoy it? As the treatment of Donald Trump showed, it is more acceptable for straight men to sexually assault women than it is for them to explore all aspects of pleasure in a consensual way. The box of behaviour for straight men is frighteningly narrow, and this negatively affects not only men, but the people and the world around them.

Are women more sexually liberated than men?

The door for women is much wider and more inviting for women than it is for straight men. That doesn’t mean all women walk through that door or that is easy for them to do it, but the entry is mapped, known, and people return from the other side to talk about it and share their experience. Women have 50 years of impassioned critical thinking that support and contextualise this sexual pilgrimage in a positive way. While gay men have perhaps the most sophisticated and progressive dialogue around sexuality and identity, straight men have not embraced or benefited much from this progress. In general terms, masturbation has been successfully recast for women as part of an empowered life. This is not the case for straight men. In general, men are very ashamed of their habits, worried what others will think of them, worried that certain acts, if known, will have huge social consequences. In general, women ‘own’ their bodies more than straight men own theirs. In general, women are much more comfortable owning toys, talking about them and incorporating masturbation as a healthy part of their lives. It is very ironic to say this when so much of our culture objectifies and stereotypes women, but in this area, straight men are in the dark ages and women have at least had their enlightenment.

Are men and women are repressed in different ways?

We’re all repressed in different ways. But certainly straight men and women have very different experiences of sexuality in our culture. Most men have a clue how difficult it is for women to retain and develop a healthy sense of self in a world that tells them every day that they’re flawed. Everywhere women look and often in their day to day interactions, they are sexualised and trivialised in ways that men rarely experience, let alone understand. Even now, we have rampant slut-shaming at best and rape and extreme violence at worst. Straight men cannot begin to understand what it is like to live in that world and retain a positive and healthy outlook towards oneself, sex, relationships and humanity. One of the great misconceptions, however, is that somehow male sexuality is accurately represented and male needs are adequately met in this world. Just because a version of male sexuality seems ever-present doesn’t mean anyones needs are being met. So most straight men live in the sexual and emotional straight jacket that the media custom-fits for their particular insecurities around masculinity. Is it any wonder there’s a problem?

What it the biggest misconception about male masturbation?

That masturbation is in any way a reflection of your overall identity. We’ve got to de-couple pleasure from sexual identity. We’re highly sexual animals. We’re literally built for pleasure and we should enjoy it, shame free. Masturbation should be considered as an opportunity for creative sexual brainstorming and seen as a pathway for personal growth, health and sexual prowess rather than as a quick, reclusive act of quiet desperation.

Can sex toys be used with sex workers?

At Buckinghamshire Escorts we welcome clients who are interested in using sex toys in their session. Buckinghamshire escorts are highly professionally trained escorts that can accommodate any request their clients may have. Our Buckinghamshire Escorts are open minded, highly erotic and well versed in male sexuality. Book one of our gorgeous Buckinghamshire Escorts to elevate your pleasure now on: +442030961214 or +442030961213.[WPCR_SHOW POSTID="ALL" NUM="5" PAGINATE="1" PERPAGE="5" SHOWFORM="1" HIDEREVIEWS="0" HIDERESPONSE="0" SNIPPET="" MORE="" HIDECUSTOM="0" ]